Comments on April's summary

April
Summary of The Graduation Present
A young man who had admired a sports car was getting ready to graduate from college. He known that his father can offered him everything he wanted. On his graduation day, his father called him and handed a beautiful wrapped gift box to him. He opened the box and found a Bible with his name embossed in gold. Young man was so disappointed so he shouted his father and left the Bible. Many years passed, young man was very successful in business and had a beautiful home and lovely family. He thought about his father because he had not seen his father since he graduated. Before he makes arrangement, he receives a telegram telling he father had passed away. When a young man had arrived his hometown, he search through his father’s important papers and saw a new Bible. Then he opened the Bible a key belong to a sports car he had desired dropped from the back of the Bible.

1. What do you like best about your peer's summary?
If there are ten points, I will give her 7.5 points. Her summary includes all points but it is too diffusive. There were also some verb tense mistakes.
2. Is it clear what is being summarized?
Yes, it is clear very much. She follows the time order.
3. Is the thesis of the original essay clear in the summary?
Yes, it is. She points out three points. First, the young man wanted a car which would be bought for his graduation present by his father. But the young man finally received a Bible. Second, when the young man was successful in business, he realized his father was old and he should go to him. However, his father was dead already. Third, he backed to his father's house searching some information. He found the Bible. He read it. There was a car key dropped from the Bible. The car, which he had desired for his graduation present, had bought by his father already.
4. If you have read the original source, did you identify the same thesis?
Yes, I did.
5. Did your peer miss any key points from his or her summary?
No, she didn't.
6. Did your peer include any of his own opinions in his or her summary?
No, she didn't.
7. Did your peer include any unimportant details in his or her summary?
No, she didn't.
8. Were any points in the summary lost?
No!!!

The Graduation Present -Summary

Summary
There was a man who was ready to graduate from college. He knew his father would buy a car which he wanted for his graduation present. He was waiting for receiving the present but finally he got a leather-bound Bible. He shouted to his father “With all your money you give me a Bible?” Then he left home and left the Bible. After many years, he was good in business and had wonderful family. He realized something. Meanwhile, there a telegram comes. His father had passed away and gave him all possessions. He backed to his father’s house and found the Bible. He read the Bible. There was a car key dropped from it. The car which was all he wanted was paid in full by his father.